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Courage Beads
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Courage
Beads is an activity adapted from Outward Bound's "Connecting
With Courage" program for 12 and 13 year old girls. In the context
of this course, courage is defined as more than moments of physical
courage. Rather, courage is expanded to include 'moral courage.'
Annie Rogers, a leading researcher on adolescent girls, rediscovered
an ancient definition of courage that aptly applies to girls'
needs today. She shares her discovery of the meaning of courage
as "to speak one's mind while telling all one's heart." This definition
is lived during Connecting With Courage. One way it's done is
through Courage Beads.
Background
- While on
their 14-day course, girls are presented with a lanyard with one
bead on it.
- Staff model
receiving a courage bead by describing a moment when they felt
courageous. It is important for staff to set a tone here by selecting
rather ordinary moments where one "told one's heart" rather than
selecting some extraordinary moment of illness or sadness. It's
okay if those moments of greater personal challenge are shared,
but to get started it is better to begin with more ordinary, day-to-day
acts of courage.
- Over the
next two weeks there are several times when the group (of 8 to
12 girls) gathers to share moments when each girl felt she was
courageous. She shares her story with the group and takes a bead.
This ritual becomes an important way for girls to express their
thoughts and feelings and they come to rely on the safety and
trust of the group to share intimate and important moments. After
a short time, girls can bring the group through this ritual with
no help from adults.
Goals
1) For girls to acknowledge their strengths and abilities to each
other and develop peer encouragement to build on those strengths;
2) to develop positive ways for girls to acknowledge each other's
skills, strengths and talents; and 3) to practice speaking and saying
things that are difficult for girls (truth about friendships, conflict,
etc.)
Materials:
A lanyard (necklace size) and various types of beads. The beads
can be in a bowl or placed into several zip-loc bags, one for each
girl in the group.
Procedure
Have girls sit in a circle and create a quiet discussion tone.
Review your agreements around meeting: (1) one person speaks at
a time; (2) everyone speaks for herself; (3) No put downs- everyone
is respected here. Ask, "What does courage mean to you?" Elicit
some responses. Why is courage important? How does it help you become
a better person? Ask if anyone has any good courage stories. Make
sure that courage is not just defined as physical courage, but that
the girls are thinking about moments of 'moral' courage - moments
where they have spoken up in defense of a friend, for example, and
gone against the expected norms to defend something they believed
in.
Tell the girls
that you want them to be courageous at camp and that you want to
take time every few days to let them reflect on moments when they
have been. Ask for some examples of times when courage might be
important at camp. These examples will hopefully include reflections
of the rules and norms you have already laid out for girls. If not,
you give concrete examples for them and ask the for other examples.
Explain that
every week, your bunk will have a girls' circle and that's when
you can describe your moment of courage to the group and take a
bead for your necklace. (An alternate way of getting a bead is for
each girl in the circle to have her own store of beads, from which
she gives a bead Courage Beads [continued] to the girl who speaks
her courage. This is a more personal way of having girls acknowledge
one another).
Setting Ground
Rules
Ask girls if they want to create any rules for the girls' circle
meeting. (See the 8 fundamental principles of a girls' circle for
some good examples for adult guidelines.) The 'rule' discussion
should be taken seriously- take notes, write on flip chart paper
so everyone knows and agrees on the rules and make sure you are
specific and (as the adult) know how to help girls enforce them.
The adult role is to make the rules work! Make the ceremony as simple
or as elaborate as you like, but most importantly, it should reflect
your values, your camp culture and thus, be authentic for the girls.
At that point
you can present a cup or bowl of beads and tell the girls that they
can take their first bead, if they feel ready. Can they describe
a moment of courage that they experienced in coming to camp this
summer?
Encourage journal
writing about moments of courage. Girls can read from their journals
to share a courage story.
Make it Special
The ritual should be made to feel special. Remember, this is
to encourage talking and sharing of feelings and emotions. This
is not necklace-making! Beads should be simple enough to discourage
sharing just to get a favorite bead. Beads should be similar so
there's no fighting over a special one.
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